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Thought for the day: Relativity

26 February 2013 39 views 2 Comments

One minute is calibrated in length by the number of oscillations a Caesium atom makes at a laboratory in France somewhere*.

However, the subjective length of a minute is different to:

– a person waiting a minute for their train to arrive (slightly slower than a standard minute).
– a person on a train which has stopped at a signal and will be on the move in a minute (approximately 2 minutes 30 seconds).
– a person whose train leaves in a minute, who isn’t yet at their train station (vastly diminished – a minute passes in about 20 seconds).

Albert Einstein never formally documented this aspect of Relativity, however with today’s technology I’m convinced that this concept could be harnessed to master time travel.

Of all perceived time dilations though, the most dramatic is when you wake up at someone else’s house, need a piss, and there’s someone in the shower. Each elapsed second stretches out into 10 observed minutes. Think of what 2 pints of water before bedtime and some judicious alarm clock setting could do for your daily morning email productivity.

* This is probably hearsay – wouldn’t be surprised to get the WHOOP! WHOOP! WHOOP! treatment on QI over this one.

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  • Paul Bird

    This is a particularly long-winded way of saying I take long showers. It’s true. Living off tank water in droughtastic Australia in my youth, I was repeatedly yelled at for wasting water. Having long showers now is one of my few comforts in a cruel and unforgiving world. This rainy, wringing wet country has given me at least that. Would you deny me this, heartless urinator?

    Oh lordy. I must be the only person who *stays* in England for the rain.

  • http://jasonbstanding.com Jason B. Standing

    Well, it certainly SEEMED like a long shower.  At least 30 minutes.  Which means it was probably just over 3.  And now this makes me think of a scene from The Jerk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzffCuopKwg

    I’m TOTALLY with you on the enjoying of lengthy hot showers thing though – a mate of mine’s place was on such tight water restrictions that they’d only fluch the toilet when it was ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY.

    People in the UK complain about the rain, but as a very wise old morris dancer told me once – “It never rains inside a pub”.